Okay, I'll discuss this with myself.  It seems to go beyond the Knowing, IMO.  It also translates into our natural behavior and elevates how we treat others.

I'm a strange one.  I do take the All One thing seriously.  I never did anything like walking up to a homeless fellow laying on the grass and give him five bucks.  I never did things like that before.  But now I do, and it's because I realize that I AM that homeless person.  Actually, a strange one happened yesterday.  My roommate and I were over at the local cannabis 'gettin' place' and when I walked out of the building into the parking lot before he did.  There was a young man of the streets, maybe 20 and obviously not quite right - shouting at nobody in particular across the street.  He was flailing his jacket against different things, like the trash can and the bus bench.  He was a mess.

But he is me.  I walked across the street with a $10 and walked up to him.  His whole demeanor switched.  He looked at me, then at the ten, then back at me, then tentatively reached out and took the money.  He was totally speechless.  (Actually, I first asked if he could use a little help - again, he was mute).  I don't know what was wrong with that young man.  Drugs maybe, or maybe just unbalanced.

But I think little things like that are so easy to do for us who don't have those problems.  Maybe it planted a little seed of consciousness - that was the intent.

Actually I was meaning to respond but been busy. I thought I'd recognized Yogi Ramacharaka's name from somewhere. I realized that he was an American author and lawyer who was either ghost-writing for someone else or was channeling a yogi.

In any case, I thought this was very good --

"The perception of the "I Am" consciousness may be likened to the bud of the flower - the flower itself being the Cosmic Knowing.

It is clear that he knew what he was writing about. Labels differ but the essence is clearly expressed in this succinct statement. 

I'm going to order this book, even though I've got shelves of unread books and haven't cracked any of them open in some time... this one really called out to me based on your description.

The I am pretty much sums up my unfolding process these last few cycles around our sun.

For a time I endeavored to dissolve every aspect of my notion of self and my assumptions about life.

I haven't been able to utterly dissolve every thing, but there was a point where the unshakable realization became Vajra.

"when absolutely all else dissolves, what remains?  Awareness.  I am."

From this point, all practice, forms, seekings unfolded into the one life process of simple presence.

'i amness' seems to have been at the core of all former pursuits.

At this point, I AM is the only thing left that seems 'real'  (paradox acknowledged and thoroughly appreciated)

An old favorite of mine I first came across his writings roughly 33 years ago. One in particular was very good " The Science of Breath" 

Posted by: @silent_thunder

I'm going to order this book, even though I've got shelves of unread books and haven't cracked any of them open in some time... this one really called out to me based on your description.

 

I hope you can find it.  It was copywritten in 1904.  If you can't find it, you can read mine.  The English is a tad stilted, but it seems like all the good old books written from about the 1890's through the 40's, metaphysical leaps were made and it became pretty apparent that our paths meet in the metaphysics, the Source, that part of us inside that is blank, dark black, and Knows.  

In fact, I was thinking about this yesterday.  If one looks at a donut, the Dao is the hole.  If one looks at our thoughts trying to describe the ineffable, our words cannot reach it.  It is as a black hole, our words disappearing into the void, unspeakable.  Just like celestial bodies disappear into the black hole - only visible because of the optical alignment of the stars looking like a ring around it.  And it is said that our bodies carry the template for the universe.  Maybe that's the basis.

Posted by: @silent_thunder

The I am pretty much sums up my unfolding process these last few cycles around our sun.

 

For a time I endeavored to dissolve every aspect of my notion of self and my assumptions about life.

I haven't been able to utterly dissolve every thing, but there was a point where the unshakable realization became Vajra.

 

Yes, it seems like there is a merging of body, soul, mind.  We become different people - even physically.  There is an Awareness that seems to encompass all three.

When I first got sober 39 years ago, it became apparent that my "best thinking" got me to where I had ended up.  So I had to accept the fact that every possible conclusion I've ever come to in life, to that point, was wrong.  Although it was humiliating at the time - my arrogance had been a real thing of beauty - it created the Beginners Mind, the most desirable quality of all.  And then the inner journey began.

Posted by: @silent_thunder

From this point, all practice, forms, seekings unfolded into the one life process of simple presence.

'i amness' seems to have been at the core of all former pursuits.

 

At this point, I AM is the only thing left that seems 'real'  (paradox acknowledged and thoroughly appreciated)

I couldn't agree more.  There is no longer the need to go out and 'do good' - the universe finds a way to bring your next project to you.  This is how it's happening over here.  I moved a total stranger into my home.  Luckily, he's wonderful, with a few needy problems attached.  I thank the Undifferentiated for teaching us the wu wei to allow us to live comfortably with each other.  (And yes, I am a Needy Person Magnet)

Life is the teacher now.

life is the teacher.

presence is the practice.

i am is the reality.

For me, the trigger occurred while watching a video on youtube where Papaji asks one of his visitors, "Can you tell me who you are in a fraction of a second"? 

I took that question and started applying it to myself...could I tell "who or what I was, in a fraction of a second, without the mind being active?" 

I found that I couldn't. Over and over again...and there seemed to be no answer. Finally, one day, it dawned upon me, there wasn't meant to be any answer that could be objectively given. All that remained when I went back to that "who am I?" in the moment was simply the knowing 'I am'!

Mind-blown!! In an instant, it became clear to me what "I am" really meant. How it was the root of the mind as we know the mind -- without that sense of Being, nothing else can be.

But then came the doozy...what is it that knows this "I am"? 🙂 

I am that that which knows "I am"...

Posted by: @silent_thunder

life is the teacher.

 

presence is the practice.

 

i am is the reality.

 So beautiful. Succinct. Hidden in plain sight.

Posted by: @dwai

But then came the doozy...what is it that knows this "I am"?  

 

Sorry about the happy face.  One more time, it's huge.  It takes up my whole screen.  Maybe it'll go away after I post.

Yes!!!  That's the very question.  "What is it that knows I Am?"

That is a wonderful example of an answerless question. 

I find myself living in answerless questions now.

Answers present themselves but are no longer adopted as self, as unshakable truth, or True Nature.

Vajra

I recall in my former scientific life.  The way one forumlates a question/hypothesis determines the set of possible answers one will find.

Change the form, wording and focus of the question and the possible solutions changes... for in the forming of the question, belies the assumptions and projective biases which will filter returning information into what amounted for me in caged answers.

I love answerless questions.  Questions whose answers reflect the shift of awareness.  Like a Picasso painting of 12 perspectives of one model, all overlayed on one canvas.  Which one is most true?  which is patently false?  All answers reflect the state of my mind and the tone of my perceiving in that moment.

So rather than strive for answers, I relish living in unanswerable questions. 

It may seem odd, pathetic even... but it's bliss for me.

And not a manic bliss... but a very simple contented presence.

Presence is the answerless answer.  Always applicable, adapting to shifting perception and condititions and requiring no permanence of mind, nor any claims that must last for eternity. 

Just me, as I am... aware... now.

I hear you.

This is another paragraph that pops out at me this morning, - and it is saying exactly what you just said, ST.

Pg. 73

The sense of immortality will come gradually as the consciousness unfolds.  But the student must not allow himself to live too much in "the upper regions," or to despise his body or the world and people around him.  This is down as 'spiritual pride', and will have its downfall.  You are here in the world for a purpose, and must get the experiences necessary to fully round you out.  You are in exactly the best position for the experiences you need - and you will not be kept there one moment longer than is necessary for your ultimate good.  Live, grow, and unfold - living your own life - doing the best you can.  And be kind.

                  (Emphasis mine)

I used to worry about the 'being here for a purpose' thing.  That almost implicates that there is a separate entity out there that is calling the shots for us.  But one day I got to thinking about the illusiveness of linear time.  It's like a Slinky toy.  The one that goes down the stairs by itself.  Linear time is when the slinky is stretched out.  But my magic slinky, once it's collapsed, actually turns into a disc (rather than a little pile of coils).  The disc is Now.  It's all happening Now.  History is Now.  Future is Now.  In my endeavors, I do this collapse of time so that a situation can be seen in its entirety.  Of course, future isn't known but can certainly be pointed to from the triangulation points of Past and Now.  The plumb line runs through both and points the way to Future.  

But - and this is what is nice about seeing it this way - is that the Now and the Future can always be changed.  But the changes have to be made in the Now.  And those are done by inner adjustment of ourselves - realizing that once the Consciousness is there, it is as was written above.  Let life unfold.  And realizing that it really is all One, and we ARE the Intelligence.

Okay, that infinite beam of light sounds a lot like my kundalini energy. It is with me 24/7. It's like my spine is always sparkling or something.  

What a beautiful exchange ?

Posted by: @manitou

 And be kind.

                  (Emphasis mine)

I think that's the biggest change in me, honestly, during this whole journey.  Being kind is something you do when you are not so focused on yourself.  It's to keep the other person's welfare in mind, sometimes setting their wishes before yours.  I have changed into a much kinder person than I used to be.  I was pretty rough around the edges, between law enforcement and alcoholism.  Kindness wasn't a label someone would put on me.

But, after many years, I find that the kindness found its way into me.  I am kind today, I'm polite.  That wasn't always so.

I was walking my dogs around the mobile home park, and my  dog pooped on this guy's driveway, right at the street.  I picked it up.  The guy came running out and hollering and was really upset that my dog had pooped in front of his driveway.  He hollered horrible things.  I merely said 'I'm sorry, I'm new here and I haven't learned where the assholes live yet'.

I thought that was pretty kind, considering. ? But he hollered "BLOW ME!" as I walked away from him.  What a guy...

But, of yeah, kindness is king.

Ramacharaka:

The "I Am" consciousness comes to a soul which has unfolded sufficiently to admit of the rays of knowledge from the Spiritual Mind, and then that soul simply KNOWS, that's all  It has the actual spiritual KNOWLEDGE that it is an entity - immortal - but it cannot explain it to others, nor can it, as a rule, even intellectually explain it to itself.  Its simply knows.  And that knowing is not a matter of opinion, or reasoning, or faith, or hope, or blind belief.  It is a consciousness - and like any other form of consciousness, it is most difficult to explain to one who has never experienced it.  Imagine what it would be to explain light to a man born blind - sugar to one who had never tasted a sweet thing - cold to one who dwelt in a tropical country and who had never experienced the sensation.  

They've been talking about Ramacharaka in the book I'm listening to, The Unfettered Soul.  Interesting out of all the guru's on all the internet that his name would pop here, too. 

Listening to his philosophy has given more appreciation for going deeper into the Vispassana exercise I'd do before meditating. ie

I am not my thoughts, they are likes passing in a wide sky

I am not my emotions, I honor & let them like ripples in a pond

I am not my past, they are old memories & patterns that do not define me

I am not my future, that is..

I am not things..

I am not my family..

I am not possessions..

I am breath and awareness

"This appearance of the bud of Spiritual Consciousness - the first rays of Illumination - mark a most critical period in the evolution of the soul.  And, as the little manual states, it occurs only after the storm - only when the silence has succeeded and replaced the rush of the winds - the roar and crash of the thunder - the terrifying incidents of the tempest.  In the calm, restful period that follows the storm, great things await the soul.  So remember this, O soul, when you find yourself in the midst of the great storm of spiritual unrest, which is sweeping away all the old landmarks - which is tearing away all that you have been leaning against to support yourself - which causes you to imagine that all is being swept away from you, leaving you alone without comfort, or support.  For in that moment of spiritual distress when all is being taken away from you, there is coming to you that peace which passeth all understanding, which will never leave you, and which is well worth the stress of a thousand storms.  The time of mere blind belief is passing from you - the time of knowing is at hand"

As I see it, it doesn't just happen once.  Within my own life I can look back at the horrible fears - of losing my home during a bankruptcy - where I had no idea where I would land.  Of being pensioned with PTSD from my career - and not knowing what I was going to do.    Of coming to grips with the fact that I was an alcoholic, 40 years ago.  Of losing my loving spouse of 35 years.  How horrible each and every experience seemed at the time.  And yet, it's as he says above.  There is a peace that finally wins out, and that peace is more in the forefront now - and that peace does remain, despite everything happening in the world.  It's almost as though it becomes an armor to protect from fear.